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Posts filed under ‘∆ stullig’


Endless Potential

07/28/2013

Kirby

Often used to compare other men to. Is said to exist only in the lust-filled imagination of women everywhere.
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A kirby is a master of the sexual arts and is an amazing lover. Often citing his 36 orgasm minimum rule, the women who are lucky enough to be with a kirby are always allowed to miss work for a few days of bed-rest from sheer exhaustion.
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It is said that a kirby can also make a woman orgasm by merely thinking about her. This is true of course, but he rarely ever does this since the orgasm is often so violent as to cause what people today call ‚earthquakes‘.
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His sense of humor is incredible. In fact instead of breaking up with a woman and condemning her to a hellish life without him, a kirby will often make her orgasm while making her laugh. This combination is very lethal. It makes him sad to see her go, but at least she died happy (and satisfied).
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A kirby’s intelligence knows no bounds. He knows pretty much everything, and if he doesn’t know something he makes it up, but he knows how to bend space and time to make that which he made up true.

Kirby: The god standard for men.



Strobocat

07/27/2013

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Strobocat commands you to click it’s picture



The True Störy of Jesus pt.VI

And o, Jesus and the disciples walked to Nazareth, but the trail was blocked by a giant brontosaurus with a splinter in his paw. And o, the disciples did run a-shrieking ‚What a big fucking lizard, Lord.‘ But Jesus was unafraid, and he took the splinter from the brontosaurus‘ paw, and the big lizard became his friend. And Jesus sent him to Scotland where he lived in a Loch for oh so many years, inviting thousands of American tourists to bring their fat fucking families with their fat fucking children and their fat dollar bills in their fatty fucking fingers. And o‘ Scotland did praise the Lord. Thank you, Lord. O Thank you, Lord.



Politically Correct Combat Training



Évolüsyon



Come ‚ere You

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Pettin‘

07/23/2013



Keith Richards

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Quadruped. Graminivorous. Forty teeth, namely twenty-four grinders, four eye-teeth, and twelve incisive. Sheds coat in the spring; in marshy countries, sheds hoofs, too. Hoofs hard, but requiring to be shod with iron. Age known by marks in the mouth.



Protect & Serve

07/20/2013



DIY: Protect your intellectual Property

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Deep



Animals From Kreuzberg XXXXI

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Protectin our Peeps since 1843



Sugoooiii



Just Nod and Say Yes

07/18/2013

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Is Your Son Obsessed With Lunix?



Dadventure

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Last weekend for my fourteenth birthday I went on a crazy dadventure, we rode horses in Half Moon Bay, spied on the nude beach, had a burger at some crappy bar, and ended up at the Rodin sculpture garden at Stanford University. Mom said, „You smell like horse shit and beer, just like your father“.



Bummer

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Banana Bender

07/16/2013

Disclaimer:

Strawberries aren’t berries.
A banana is a berry.
We are serious.
Look it up.
Integrate the knowledge.
Deal with it



Animals From Kreuzberg XXXX

07/13/2013

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Top Dog is a very intelligent, talking dog who befriends a human child named Joey Jordan. Top Dog goes on to live with Joey, who promises not to expose the fact that Top Dog can speak. The duo go on to have adventures involving spies, criminals and mad scientists, after it is revealed that Top Dog was formerly „Mr. X“, a government agent who was valued for his intelligence, but had to disguise his canine nature with a cover ID and a full-body cloak.



French

The language of Sex



Magenschmerzen

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„What’s this in the stir fry? Chicken?“

„That’s ficken. Tasty, huh?“

„Yeah, not bad.“